Are You Ego-Scrolling? All You Need to Know About The Latest Dating Trend

In today’s digital dating landscape, finding someone genuine can feel like an impossible mission. The quest for meaningful connections is often disrupted by toxic behaviors like ghosting, breadcrumbing, orbiting, and catfishing. Now, a newer-and sneakier-trend has emerged: ego-scrolling.

What is ego-scrolling?

Ego-scrolling is the act of swiping through dating apps solely for self-validation. The goal isn’t to build a connection or go on a date-it’s to boost one's ego. People who engage in this behavior enjoy matching with others just to feel desired or attractive. Once their confidence is fed, they may suddenly vanish, offer brief attention before pulling back, or simply not respond at all after matching. It’s like browsing a catalog for compliments rather than relationships.

Why do people do it?

Several factors can lead someone to ego-scroll. For some, it stems from loneliness, boredom, or a need for affirmation during stressful times. Others may turn to dating apps as a quick fix for low self-esteem or feelings of invisibility in real life. For some, it can be a medium to have the attention after a breakup.

According to trauma and relationship therapist Jordan Pickell, ego-scrolling acts as a buffer against emotional risks like rejection or vulnerability. She told USA Today that she compares it to “window shopping without any intention of buying”-a safe way to feel wanted without engaging emotionally.

In more extreme cases, ego-scrolling may even serve as a tool for control. Swiping, matching, and receiving attention can create a sense of power and desirability without requiring any real investment.

The emotional fallout

While ego-scrolling may feel harmless to the person doing it, the ripple effects can be quite damaging. Those genuinely seeking connection may feel misled, confused, or rejected without knowing why. It fosters a dating environment where meaningful intentions are masked by superficial engagement.

For someone on the receiving end, it may feel like being used for emotional convenience-a quick hit of attention before being discarded.

Can ego-scrolling be avoided?

If you catch yourself swiping just for the dopamine hit, it might be time for a self-check. Seeking occasional validation is human, but misleading others along the way isn’t fair. Here’s how to be more mindful:

Be honest: If you’re not looking for something serious, say so in your profile or in your conversations. Transparency helps others manage expectations.

Set boundaries: Avoid engaging with others if you're not mentally or emotionally available to follow through.

Reflect on intentions: Ask yourself why you're using the app. Is it boredom? Loneliness? Validation? Understanding your "why" can help shift your approach.

Dating with integrity

At its core, dating apps are meant to connect people. When used authentically, they can lead to wonderful outcomes. But when validation becomes the primary goal, it diminishes the experience for everyone involved. You might not realise it then, but you could actually kill someone's hope of finding connections-love for that matter only to have some attention.

In a world where dating already feels like finding a needle in a haystack, the last thing we need is more emotional games. So if you're swiping, swipe with purpose-and maybe a little kindness, too.

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